Saturday, March 17, 2012

Like a lobster and obese to overweight

Well, I did break down and get some fries and a blt chix sandwich. I was not a fan of the sandwich and each bite I kept thinking, take off the bun! Followed by, you're eating fries, what does it matter?

Interestingly enough, it fixed my belly issue and things were nice after that. Maybe I wasn't consuming enough fiber. Odd.

I laid out in the sun today to absorb some Vitamin D. I flipped every 15 minutes until after 3 when I sat for 30. Idiot. I am now painfully red in unusual spots. When was I last out in the sun in a bathing suit, you ask? Probably the last time the moon was blue. But I was excited. My regular suits were big and so I tried on a hold out, and it fit! A bit of belly bulge from underneath as it is not a long torso, like I need, but I loved it. Still love it. And so do all the bumble bees, poor things think I am a flower.

I was thinking of my favorite Vietnamese soup all day, probably from watching a food show where Emeril said he loved a Vietnamese Pho, and planned to get the soup only, $6, even cheaper with military discount. After my shower and oiling for my scorched skin, I was lazy and didn't want to go but also didn't want to have my leftover homemade soup. So I packed up some magazines and headed out. I was impressed with myself that I added, slowly, a ton of (hot) sriracha sauce. Very impressed actually. Neither it nor the fresh jalapenos had much kick to me. That is until I choked, whao was that crazy hot coming from the back to the front of my mouth. I think some got stuck in my soft pallet around my uvula. Ouch. Good thing I had a full glass of water and was facing away from everyone.

See, I went in with the idea to get a small Pho soup (still really big) and a water to drink and that's it. I had 4 meals all day, good since its a 5 meal plan plus the lean and green meal. But I was starving all day. I did eat carbs the night before so that could be why, tends to be a common trait, carbs and hunger, stay in ketosis, no nagging hunger. Anyway, whether it was hunger, the fact that usually I get a small other soup and then my larger one, or loneliness, I ended up asking for some fried spring rolls. I don't eat them normally, because the oil and my IBS are not friends. So I think at that point I was lonely and wanted time to finish my magazine. I bit into one of the 4 (I think he gave me extra) and instantly knew I didn't want it. It was good, I am not saying it wasn't. But if I am going to consume the cals, I want to want to consume those cals. That's when I was thinking maybe I was lonely. I am and I am not. But usually DH and I go and try things at this place. I almost always get the Pho (pronounced ph-ah) soup. God, I love Vietnamese food. And I will try something new and make DH taste it. That way if its not his thing, he isn't stuck eating it and looking for more being unsatisfied. I know exactly how that can be. So maybe that was it. Maybe its because its a Saturday night. Maybe because its St. Patrick's Day and I am not doing a pub crawl, which I could care less about, with people.

Do I want to leave the house? No. I actually want to be in bed right now since its after 10pm and my belly is full. But that does not mean I am not lonely in my usual endeavors. So I think that is why I ordered the thing I never order. So instead of a $4 discounted meal, I had a $12 with a 3 dollar tip to make an even 15. Ugh, figures. I don't cheat the tip when it comes to discounts. Its total amount and round up to nearest dollar. Unless its cash, which is non-taxable (shhhh don't tell the IRS) income for the staff. But I almost never carry or use cash.

Back to the restaurant, I asked if they still had military discount (I knew they did, but easier just to ask all the time) and then asked if he needed to see an id. The kid of the owners, 20 something maybe, shook his head and kinda laughed. As I was John Hancocking the bill I thought, next time I am making him give me the bill before I can order anything else! Although he did ask if I was ready after my soup... I handed it over and he said, see you next time! I had to smile at the fact that we are regulars to this family owned restaurant. And he remembered me, which is why he was surprised I said "one." Looking around me to the door, he was looking for DH.

So next time, get the LARGE soup for $2 more and not the rolls for $4, and I can eat for 2 days, at least 2 meals. Or a Chinese soup first, like I usually do, again $2 or $3, but I always get 2 meals out of my Pho then.

I entered my food into my MF food log and calculator. While I didn't add the sriracha sauce or the hoisin sauce, which I should now that I remember what its called, I am still -700 cals today! Wait! I forgot to add in my 30 mins of treadmill walk at 2.5 which brings me to 1.2 miles. I was on the treadmill talking with DH today, and Mom when she beeped in. That makes me -827. Go me, although I need to be at zero even. Negative calories means I will be hungry later on or tomorrow. What it actually means is that my weight loss might stall because my body thinks its in starvation mode. It will be fine. I added the hoisin, 3 tbs max which I think is way overboard because I like my soup hot not sweet. But there is no sriracha sauce listed. Oh well. That brings me to -721. O! No more hoisin!

I decided to do the MF chat after I logged my Pho and rolls in for dinner. The dialog was uninteresting to me and I typed like a drunkard, but someone mentioned BMI. I figured I should look mine up. At my current weight, 186.6, I am on the cusp...... of obese and overweight!!!! OMG! Just 7lbs more and it will be official, with the caveat that its a percentage thing, and on the internet, so its not exact. But from 240 to here, its amazing! The dialogue in the chat room was about their love and craving for Olive Garden. While it is yummy, it holds no sway over me anymore, nor do many others. Just look up the cals and fat in those yums, and you won't eat it all the time if ever again. I don't even like the breadsticks anymore. Maybe I'll eat half of one if I am out to lunch with others-won't let it to the table with DH and I- but I don't even want that. Go me! I think it all comes down to making the effort to search, realizing, and understanding what you are consuming. Pink slime in my meat, I am fine with that. 4000 cals for nothing, oh no. I am going to eat and enjoy for that kind of sin to my poor body. And I can eat a ton of spinach and garlic for 4000 cals. There is no going hungry or feeling miserable there!

My plan for tomorrow: SUNSCREEN (idiot! winter in Florida, hello office-dweller, that is from Mom, we already talked on the phone as I was headed to the restaurant); more moisturizing my lobster back; going to the Commissary for some more salad, creamer (as I let it sit out for 24 hours, morning is not my thing) that does not have partially hydrogenated oil in it, and any odds and ends I want, although I am list type of girl and I don't need much as I plan to clean out the freezer (except corn, a nono, that is for DH only); Class 6 for car fuel; and then home for some laundry and maybe reading or Netflix movies. Oh and pratice for that speech I have to give to about 200 people on Monday. Ugh. Talk about stressing me out. It keeps me up at night and wakes me up at odd hours. I thought someone else was giving it, she thought I was doing it. Great. Oh well. So maybe the order of unwanted rolls were from my underlying stress that won't let me get a good nights sleep. Time for me to go check.

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